Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Do Svidaniya, Powers Boothe

The news has come in that Powers Boothe died on Sunday. This follows on the heels of the death of John Hurt. I’m sure he’s remembered mostly for his more recent work, but I remember him as the fighter pilot who was shot down in the 1984 movie Red Dawn.


photo by Jane Boursaw



Red Dawn was somewhat simplistic in how it showed a group of American teenagers doing guerilla attacks behind the lines of a Soviet/Cuban invasion force. But it did show a healthy kind of gun culture. And it gained some credibility by having Boothe’s character of a colonel giving them tactical advice.


Those of you who saw the movie will know why I chose the phrase do svidaniya

Saturday, May 13, 2017

The Play’s the Thing

A few weeks ago, I attended students recitals and a play at a middle school run by a friend of mine.

(Apologies to those not pictured. The ones who appear are random.)

Overall, the class could recite massive amounts of quotations from scripture and classical literature.



I was not educated that way. It would have done me a lot of good to be required to stand and deliver.

Individual eighth-graders stood and delivered their own presentations, playing characters from history. Below is Sir Francis Drake.



Each presentation was by memory and highly impressive. Sir Walter Raleigh is in the foreground below.



Instead of just reciting facts, each student gave a first person biography, including the ambiguous nature of these real-life figures.

The play was A Midsummer’s Night Dream. Below is Oberon, King of Shadows.



As you can see, a lot of work went into the costumes. Also, the players didn’t just stand around and recite lines. They were almost constantly in motion.

Below is Nick Bottom



Wondering why a Shakespearean character has a donkey’s head? Read a book.


Overall, it was a wonderful evening. Many thanks to Sara Loudon and her Covenant Christian Middle School. 

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Prince Philip, Royal Troller, Retires

Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh and Consort of Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth, announced yesterday he is retiring from performing royal duties. He is only 95.

He showed he has a sense of humor by dubbing himself “the world's most experienced plaque-unveiler.”

He’s made infamous off-the-cuff comments over the years, and it’s not clear when he was joking and when he was not.


 What's he about to say next?
photo by Kiefer

To a child visiting a space shuttle: “Well, you'll never fly in it, you're too fat to be an astronaut.”

To a disabled man on a scooter: “How many people have you knocked over this morning on that thing?”

To the president of Nigeria in traditional robes: “You look like you’re ready for bed.”

To Australian Aborigines: “Do you still throw spears at each other?”

I won’t print what he said about Chinese, because I actually found it offensive. And I can’t print what he said about the Russians. But he could always have some secretary issue a royal apology.


So he had a good run. He did a lot of ceremonial things and met a lot of people. And he couldn’t get fired for what he said.

Saturday, April 29, 2017

Network Supervillains Win: Powerless Gets Cancelled

(Apologies to my non-American readers for this rant.)
I’m angry. My favorite television show got cancelled. Powerless told the story of the team at Wayne Security who worked around the clock and goofed off around the clock, developing protective gear for innocent bystanders of superhero battles.

Afraid of getting hit by bricks during one of those aforementioned battles? You need their brickproof umbrellas—which cascades bricks to the side, meaning they can sell more umbrellas. Or afraid of getting scorched by a ball of flame? You need their fireproof poncho, and they may or may not get a superheroine to pose naked in the ad before she dons it. (Poncho does not protect against rain.)

The series mainly focuses on office humor. The minor superheroes they encounter are actually off to the side. Emily, played by Vanessa Hudgens, has frustrating misadventures as she tries to bond with team members, save a good invention, or break her way into the good ol’ boy club that makes up the board. Her sunny smile, her awkwardly fading smile, and her wickedly triumphant smile just about carry the show.

Her incompetent boss, Van Wayne (a cousin of you-know-who), played by Alan Tudyk, often steals the scene with his vapid stupidity. His blunders, as well as the egos of the team members, can ruin Emily’s best-laid plans.



So, what happened? Their premier episode was funny, their second episode was outstandingly funny, and their third episode was okay. That may have let their ratings go down. Also, they were put on against Supernatural, which claimed part of their demographic. (This is like how Buffy the Vampire Slayer almost didn’t make it at first, because it was put on against Ally McBeal, which ruled among young females.) Then NBC preempted two of their episodes to premier some other comedy that wasn’t funny, which makes the audience forget to tune in again.

The rest of the show continued to be funny. It was the highlight of my Thursday evenings. But the morons at NBC cancelled it. If you’re able to access it through Comcast or Xfinity or whatever, hurry and record the available episodes of Powerless before they go away. 

Monday, April 10, 2017

Earth-Shattering Love: Movie Review of Your Name

Mitsuha is a teenage girl living in a village in Japan so small, it doesn’t even have a coffee shop. She hates the rural life and longs to move to Tokyo. Taki is a rather ordinary teenage boy in Tokyo who commutes to school by train and who works as a waiter.

One day, Taki wakes up in what is obviously a girl’s body in a house he doesn’t recognize. The next day, Mitsuha is told by her sister and her friends that she acted oddly the previous day—not recognizing people and acting as if she had amnesia, though she cannot remember it. Taki has the same experience. After a while, they realize they are switching bodies.

Overjoyed at being in Tokyo, Mitsuha spends too much of Taki’s money. And Taki doesn’t know how to play basketball or sit with feminine modesty. The switching happens on random days, so they write notes to each other, starting with Mitsuha writing her name on Taki’s hand. As they become more convinced of the reality of the phenomenon, they make detailed notes in each other’s diaries, including complaints about each other’s behavior.

Taki finally decides to call Mitsuha. But the call cannot be completed. And they stop switching bodies. What happened?


Your Name is advertised as the #1 film of Japan in 2016. I don’t know if they mean the #1 animated film, or if it’s just hype. But it is a beautiful movie. I can only say the twist that occurs shows that this phenomenon involves more than just Mitsuha and Taki. And the theme of “Who are you?” pervades the movie.

Some cultural notes:
-In Japan, they drive on the left side of the road.
-It is normal to eat rice and fish at breakfast.
-Politicians really do drive around in trucks and vans to give speeches on the street.
-High schoolers in Tokyo do commute by train.


Whether you’re a fan of anime or never had an interest in it before, Your Name is well worth seeing in a theater. Please do not be offended by their reactions at finding themselves in bodies of the opposite sex. Bring glasses if your theater has the subtitled version, and do yourself a favor by not reading any online descriptions of the movie. Some of the online people said they cried, but I avoided that by an act of will. 

Monday, April 3, 2017

Wonder Woman’s Shaved Underarms—Rage Against . . . Something

The latest controversy that makes twitter heads explode is the observable fact that Wonder Woman, the titular character in the upcoming movie, has no hair at all in her underarms. They look quite polished. And even though she is a superheroine who can hold her own with Batman and Superman, extremists who have their hair tied back so tightly it interferes with brain circulation claim that this is a sign of being dominated by the patriarchy. If only we had known it was so easy.


Gal Gadot, former combat trainer in the Israeli military and
the former Miss Israel in the 2004 Miss Universe contest and  
former model, now turned actress. 5’10”  

photo by Gage Skidmore

There are more pressing issues: How does Superman shave? Does he use razors with Kryptonite edges? And why isn’t Bruce Wayne horribly scarred up? Considering his lack of superpowers and all the fights he’s been in, he would be in pretty sad shape.

Or perhaps the world of superheroes isn’t meant to be completely realistic. How many women have you met in real life who looked like the Wonder Woman in the comic books or in the movies?


And this controversy does the opposite of showing the oppression of women. In The Hobbit, Bilbo Baggins was referred to as a “child of the kindly west.” You have to be a child of the kindly west (or part or an elite elsewhere) to have the time and energy to fuss about this, considering how women are treated in the majority of the world. So relax and enjoy a comic book fantasy. 

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Amazonfresh and Burger King

I was doing some errands this morning when I saw an amazonfresh truck pull into a fast food joint:



If you look at the right side of the picture, you’ll see the amazonfresh truck. To be fair, the guy was just getting some breakfast. But it's fun to imagine this is what would happen if a local Burger King ran out of food.

I haven’t seen a food truck scene this funny since I saw the Oscar Mayer Weiner Mobile after I got home from a Worldcon.  

Monday, March 13, 2017

Young, Blonde, and Out for Revenge—Review of Falcone Strike

Falcone Strike is Christopher Nuttall’s sequel to The Oncoming Storm (see my review here), so we know that Kat Falcone survived the hair-raising climactic scenes in the first book. A hero of the Commonwealth, her reward is to be given an impossible mission: She must lead a flotilla of decrepit ships that are old enough to be called antiques behind enemy lines, raiding as much of the enemy supply lines as she can.

It takes so long to install modern parts on the ships, half the crew get assigned to other missions. They get mismatched crew members—including shore patrolmen, who used to get in fistfights with crew on leave. But Kat still has Williams, her executive officer, whose long experience and steady hand were so vital in their original adventure.

So, leading a flotilla that could be vaporized by one broadside of an enemy dreadnought, Kat goes to do as much damage to the enemy as possible, to make up for the shellacking they gave her Commonwealth.



Once again, Christopher Nuttall has delivered a fresh and believable military science fiction novel. We are right there with Kat Falcone as she has to grope her way through uncertain space. Her dilemmas are laid out by realistic dialog, and although each decision has its pluses and minuses, we can see her reasoning.

This is a hardened Kat compared to what she was like in the first novel. If a civilian enemy ship is given the chance to surrender and it powers up its engines, she destroys it.

William, her executive officer, uses his experience and contacts to get in with raiders, which anyone else would find impossible to do, to extract needed information from that disgusting group. And we get more insight into the nature of the enemy, who are striking out from their home planet of Ahura-Mazda—religious fanatics with whom there can be no compromise.

As with the first novel, Nuttall set us up for conflicts that did not occur—no fistfights among the crew, no equipment failure at critical moments. And he still italicizes words to show stress in the wrong part of a sentence, if you know what I mean.


But get The Oncoming Storm, then Falcone Strike. If you like science fiction and are not familiar with the military side, or vice versa, these will be good reads. 

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

The Dread Night—A Temple Excerpt

Here’s an excerpt from my historical fantasy manuscript. Iphi (short for Iphigenia) was taken away from her family in Mycenae, in ancient Greece. Now a grown woman in a foreign temple, she sees unexplainable events happening one night. This is how the chapter ends.

photo by Rita 1234

Noise surrounded the temple—rushing winds. Iphi stopped with her mouth open. A chill like a winter stream crept up her back. The sound wasn’t a low roar but higher, as if whistling through cracks. It resembled a woman’s scream.

The wind blew in through the high windows, and the lamps flickered wildly, casting weird shadows on the plastered walls. One by one, they blew out in their sconces. Iphi regained her ability to speak. “This can’t be. The wind reaching the lamps?”

It started with the ones closest to the double doors. The darkening of the lamps ebbed towards them, the far parts of the walls and stone slabs of the floor disappearing from sight. It was as if some unseen being was approaching, trapping them in darkness. As the last two lamps on either side of the hall remained flickering, she knew their light was what stood between her and madness.

She felt arms about her thighs and looked down to see Melinta holding her. The grip of her strong hands was uncomfortable, but she couldn’t bring herself to shrug off the girl, whose wide eyes showed silent fear. The other three women were whimpering as they huddled together, their black eyes and red lips hideous in the failing light.


Iphi looked back in time to see one of the remaining lamps go out. She stared at the last one, holding her breath, waiting.

Monday, February 27, 2017

No Books Left—A University Bookstore Closes

As I went up the steps into the University Bookstore in Bellevue, Washington, on a recent Saturday a man in front of me said, “No books left.”

This was part of a group of bookstores that supplied textbooks and memorabilia to the University of Washington, whose main campus is in Seattle. They also sold a variety of books that could be found in a typical bookstore

I didn’t normally go there, but when I heard they would be closing, I decided to visit.



What the man said was not actually true—the books were gone from the area in front of the stairs. To the right, a lot of books were still left, but going fast. All books were 75% off. One man bought a stack of science fiction books he could barely carry. I bought a history book I may review one day.

It reminded me of the recent closure of the Barnes & Noble bookstore at the Crossroads Mall, also in Bellevue. A friend who runs a private school said she should buy her books at bookstores instead of online. I told her that would be a major expense for her, while it would be undetectable by the bookstore. There was nothing we could do to stop these closures.


The University Bookstore in Bellevue closed on February 15. 

Saturday, February 18, 2017

We Were Soldiers Once—and Young

Lt. General Harold (Hal) Moore passed away recently. He was the author of We Were Soldiers Once—and Young. Back when he was a lieutenant colonel, he was in command of the 7th Airborne Cavalry during the Vietnam War. On November 4, 1965, they engaged the North Vietnamese Army (NVA). This was the first major battle between the U.S. Army and the NVA, and they thought they were outnumbered three to one. Now that the government of Vietnam has released many of their records, I believe it was more like four or five to one. They were completely surrounded.

The book describes the battle in bloody detail. Artillery shells blew the bodies of the NVA soldiers to pieces when they launched human wave attacks. Rocket-propelled grenades were used to deadly effect. The main action was with rifle fire. But as the ammo ran out, the fighting could be hand-to-hand.



I have read ten books on the Vietnam War, and this one was by far the best. Do you dislike guns or have never read a gritty account of modern warfare? Read this book. (Just as in a previous post, I advised readers who think psychology is bunk to read an issue of Psychology Today.)

Some standout scenes:
-The cutoff platoon: In rapid succession, the lieutenant was killed, the platoon sergeant was killed, another sergeant was killed. Where were the maps? Where were the call signs to use over the radio? And the medic was killed.
-Modern artillery: The artillery was five miles away. But from highly precise instructions from the front of the battle, the artillery shells could land as close as thirty yards to the American troops. High explosive, napalm, white phosphorus. Some were timed to explode in mid-air.
-Crazy pilots: Some would fly less than a hundred feet off the ground, releasing their bombs on the North Vietnamese.
-The home front: This was the first battle in which telegrams notifying family members of soldiers’ deaths arrived while the battle still raged. The Army sent cab drivers—cab drivers!—to deliver them. When one particular officer found out, he insisted that an officer and a chaplain deliver any further ones. 

The co-author was Joseph Galloway. He became a real combat reporter. When he arrived at the battle, he tripped and fell on his face in the dirt, along with his cameras, amusing Hal Moore.

When the movie version, We Were Soldiers, came out, Galloway had to excuse himself from a friendly fire scene he knew was coming up. His attempt to save a horribly burned soldier is portrayed with brutal accuracy.


I remember a scholar once saying that Alexander the Great was the first of his soldiers to step over the wall of a city to attack it, and that cannot occur in modern warfare. But it did. Hal Moore was the first to step off a helicopter into the unfriendly landing zone. He was the last to leave, stepping onto a helicopter after what had become a battlefield was cleared of American bodies. 

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

If Chins Could Kill—Book Review

Bruce Campbell’s If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor is a surprisingly detailed account of all aspects of his life that relate to movie-making. This started in childhood, where he went beyond making G.I. Joes look wounded by burning them to charging fees for a makeshift golf course to purloining construction material to build a tree fortress.

Perhaps the most fascinating part describes how in high school Campbell acted with friends in a number of super-8 movies, made for a hundred dollars each that would actually play in theaters. By the time he was college age, he had more practical experience than a lot of drama majors.

Like so many who have unorthodox careers, he pretty much skipped college. But what steered him to horror movies? He had mostly done comedy, but he and his friends noticed that a scary scene in a horror movie always made an audience react. Campbell eventually made the lower than low budget Evil Dead movies, and the rest is history.



It’s hard to convey how uproariously funny If Chins Could Kill is. No matter how serious the event or how rocky the road to movie-making was, Campbell will describe it all with wry humor and exaggeration, as if his entire life has been one grand wink at his audience.

Almost every page has a photo or a diagram on it, which I’ve never seen in an autobiography before. This includes a diagram of how holes were cut into a floor so actors could stick their arms and legs through, to be filmed as disembodied limbs. (Remember: lower than low.)

He even goes into fundraising, which most books of this sort don’t describe. It was a matter of approaching businessmen, relatives, friends, and friends of friends, and trying to talk them into forking over money for a share in whatever profits the movie will make. I think most books don’t cover this because the process is so humiliating.


To stipulate: Chins does not cover the current Evil Dead series on Starz. But even if you’re not an Evil Dead fan (and I’m not), you’ll find this book hilarious. 

Monday, January 30, 2017

Oh no, John Hurt Passed Away

I really liked John Hurt. He was so convincing as Winston Smith getting tortured inside the Ministry of Love in 1984, I was always surprised to see him alive and looking okay afterwards.


photo by Georges Seguin

It kind of shows my taste in movies that I remember him from 1984, and as the guy who had an alien implanted on his face in Alien, and as the Viking king in Outlander (the science fiction version of Beowulf).


I know he played Caligula in I, Claudius, but I can't really think of him as playing that role, though I vividly remember a number of the Caligula scenes. As an odd twist, my mother said she recognized him in Alien from his body, not his face, because she had seen him doing his odd dance in I, Claudius

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Progress—Writing Submissions

In late August, I sent my vampire parody to a major agent I had pitched to at a writers conference. That was the Pacific Northwest Writers Conference in July, which I described here. Although the word was that the market was too saturated with vampire submissions, one agent thought it was intriguing.

Then in November, I sent it to a major science fiction/fantasy publishing house. Why did I wait so long? Probably because I was transitioning between jobs.

During the conference, Andrea Hurst, a major agent, was very generous in giving free advice. She recommended the book Self-Editing for Fiction Writers.



This was the most helpful work I’ve read in a long time. I thought that internal dialog was one of my strengths. This consists of a character thinking to herself, denoted by italics. I had my main character Dee do this while contemplating a neighbor’s lamp:

. . . and admired the two-headed floor lamp in the corner with orange and white panels. Practical for reading to the kids. She didn’t think Hope would mind if she reached back to turn—

But much of the time, this can be part of the narrative. It actually has a stronger feel to it when done this way:

. . . and admired the two-headed floor lamp in the corner with orange and white panels. Practical for reading to the kids. She didn’t think Hope would mind if she reached back to turn—

Of course, sometimes internal dialog is so idiomatic, it should just stay as internal dialog,  as when Dee’s younger sister discovers an important file:

“Alchemical Source of Vampires.” The holy grail. I’m so good, I don’t know what to do with myself.

An unrelated but similar-looking correction from Self-Editing is the overuse of italicized words to indicate which words are stressed in a sentence. I can’t find an example from my old writing too quickly, though books with that minor problem do get published, as my previous post indicated.

And sometimes it is necessary to italicize a word, as when Dee’s older sister tells her during an online chat that something is behind her.

It was some thing, heading away from or towards . . . the kids.

So I’ve thoroughly gone through my science fiction manuscript Alpha Shift and my science fiction/fantasy take on the The War of the Worlds and made a number of corrections. Now I’m going to do the same for a historical fantasy that I’ve never posted excerpts for yet. Stay tuned. 

Saturday, January 21, 2017

Young, Blonde, and Captain—Review of The Oncoming Storm

Kat Falcone is only twenty-nine but looks nineteen thanks to her flawless genes, and she is suddenly promoted to captain of a heavy cruiser in her Commonwealth of worlds. Although she was a capable officer, thirty others more senior than her should have been considered for this command. She was given it because her extremely wealthy and politically powerful father pulled strings for her.

Though infuriated at being given special treatment, Kat’s father informs her she is to investigate Cadiz—their farthest world. A rival power is obviously preparing for war, refugees have streamed into their Commonwealth, raider attacks on their civilian ships have increased, and the admiral in charge of Cadiz might not be up to the task of defending them. Kat must go there and report back.

She boards her ship and meets her executive officer, who is in his sixties and has gray hair at the temples. He thinks she looks like a child.



With The Oncoming Storm, Christopher Nuttall has established a fresh voice in military science fiction. Instead of detailing the workings of military equipment or all the ratings and sub-ratings of the non-commissioned, he realistically describes the thoughts and emotions of two people put in impossible positions: Kat, who knows that everyone realizes how young and inexperienced she is, and William her executive officer, who must do everything to support her while knowing he is the most experienced officer on the ship.


The tension between the two is not as great as Nuttall led us to expect from this setup, since Kat is incredibly competent and William is dedicated to his duty. Also, Nuttall italicizes too many words for emphasis—often the wrong word in a sentence, if you know what I mean. But the tension is high throughout the book as they take their dangerous journey to Cadiz and there confront an unexpected situation when they arrive. 

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Another One Bites the Dust—Barnes & Noble

The Barnes & Noble at the Crossroads Mall in Bellevue, WA, where I spent many an hour, closed on December 31.




What hit me was I could still see the desks inside, where I often spent time writing fiction. 

It reminds me of my previous post, which showed how a Borders bookstore became a Forever 21 store. What will happen to this closed store?

Saturday, January 7, 2017

Dollhouse Cascade Effect

If you read my previous post, you’ll know that a little girl was talking to the Alexa feature of Amazon’s Echo Dot, and the next thing you know it delivered four pounds of cookies and a huge, expensive dollhouse to her home.

And here’s the cascade effect: A number of other people who left their Echo Dot on while watching this story on TV have said that Amazon delivered dollhouses to them. This will become another news story, and on and on. Eventually, the North American continent will sink under the weight of the dollhouses.


public domain dollhouse by Thomas Quine

Echo Dot is voice-activated. How does this work? Well, in order to voice activate it, the thing has to always be listening to you: in the living room, bathroom, bedroom, etc. Um, are you really comfortable with that?


You can imagine what will happen if people add other listening devices to their homes. Men will have to stop any women from wishing out loud for diamonds. (Wait, I just discovered Amazon delivers jewelry. “Honey, I ordered that on accident.”) Of if you have security listening devices installed, you could be watching a gunfight on TV where someone cries for help, and the next thing you know a SWAT team will show up. 

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Cookies and Airlocks—The Perils and Virtues of Voice Commands

A six-year-old girl in Texas was delighted when the family received an Echo Dot for a holiday gift. It features Alexa, the digital assistant that answers questions and handles calendars, etc. The girl asked Alexa questions about cookies and a dollhouse.

The next thing you know, Amazon delivered four pounds of cookies and a $170 dollhouse. Alexa had interpreted the conversation as an order.

All this goes to show the danger of voice commands. It also serves as a segue to an excerpt from my latest science fiction manuscript, Alpha Shift.

 photo by Constantin Barbu 
  
“Emergency shutdown of docking.” Akajima spoke slowly and clearly into the arm of his chair. The ship’s systems were mostly not operated by voice commands, since past experience had shown that an officer lecturing his crew on how to fire weapons could have disastrous results.

But officers could still speak certain emergency measures into life.

A watch stander jerked his head at a monitor. “Shutdown confirmed.”

Akajima knew that in that distant part of the ship a sheet of metal as thick as the hull had rammed down at great speed in front of the airlock, sealing off the ship from its connection with the shuttle. It didn’t matter if the armor detected by the scan was armored crewmen coming out of the cylinder into the main part of the shuttle in order to board the Panama, or an armored crawler meant to speed its way through the passageways. They were denied.

His next words were addressed to the appropriate crew around him. “Action Stations Yellow. All off-duty personnel confined to their berthing compartments.”


Flashing amber lights and a shrill alarm assaulted the senses—not just any alarm, but discordant high notes mixed with simulated baby screams that threatened to crack the brain case of all who heard. Some off-duty crew had been known to sleep through fistfights in their berthing compartments, but this combination of nightmare sounds would jolt them off the bunks. 

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