Word Length – Cut, Cut, Cut

I’ve had more than one freelance editor go over my manuscript for The War of the Worlds and Fairies, but the more recent once gave me some inside baseball on word length. But first, let’s go over the starting figures.

At science fiction conventions and writers conventions, I’ve been told that adult fiction should be between 80,000 and 120,000 words, depending on the genre. My manuscript came out at 121,000 words. So before I let this editor see it, I cut 2,000 words from the first three chapters. (This isn’t as radical as it sounds—for some reason, I had people just standing around too much). You know how those studies show that if one product is offered for $100.00, and the same thing is offered for $99.99, people think the second one is a much better deal? I was hoping that 119,000 would look a lot better than 121,000.

Public domain

Well, it didn’t. This editor let me know that publishers have contracts with bookbinders that actually include a page limit. In practical terms, a novel from a new writer needs to be less than 100,000 words. It takes extra money to go beyond that, which they will for an established writer. We all know they sometimes do that for a new writer who has written something brilliant, but the odds are against you being the one.  

She pointed out chapters totaling 27,000 words that could be cut. She didn’t think they were bad—they were chapters with another group of characters battling the Martian invaders elsewhere, outside England. I was kind of afraid she would say that. But it was the logical choice. I followed her advice and cut them.

(Never get rid of material like that. Those chapters are set aside for a sequel.)

She also pointed out I had to emphasize a minor character more. I had assumed ahead of time that would be good news for a writer: write more. But this was extremely difficult. I had to insert scenes that not only fit into the timeline for this current work, but also the timeline for the sequel.

(The timeline was so complicated, I used an Excel spreadsheet for the first time while writing a novel. See my entry here.)

So I cut more words and added the new scenes The current word count is about 93,800.

And that’s how it’s done.

How I Found the Write Path

Carrie Butler, who often gives helpful advice to writers on her blog, posed an interesting challenge: write a letter to a younger version of yourself, when you first started writing.

Dear self:

Right now, you’re writing as a way to relieve the frustrations and disappointments in life. Keep at it. One day you’ll finish the novel you’re writing. After that, you’ll realize you need to get past that and go on to write other short stories and novels. It’s not that what you’re writing right now is so horrible. It’s that you’ll grow so much in this skill, you won’t have trouble leaving it behind to go on to greater things.

Keep on reading and watching what you love: science fiction and fantasy. You’ll read The Lord of the Rings again someday, believe it or not. Make sure to watch the reruns of Star Trek: The Next Generation. (I know, it’s still playing, but keep an eye out for reruns.) When the SciFi channel shows their version of the really weird movie Dune, watch it and note the phrase, “The sleeper must awaken.” That is what will happen to your life.

You will become the person you never imagined you would be: the one who goes to conventions and conferences and pitches your manuscript to professionals. Watch out for females who seem to have a sexual attraction to you. This is not ego; this is a lifestyle among people who travel frequently, and it is a snare to avoid.

Do not be offended at the lack of capitalization after colons or the single spaces after periods in this letter. Fads come and go, even in capitalization and punctuation. This, perhaps more than anything else, is evidence that this letter is from the future. No investment or job advice is included, since that would alter the timeline.

Mark

Mark Murata

http://suburbanfantasy.blogspot.com/

“I give permission for my entry to be included in the e-book compilation without royalties and/or separate compensation.”

Review of Godzilla

I saw the new Godzilla movie. He gets along so swimmingly, it could be subtitled, Godzilla Joins the Navy.  If you like giant monster movies, you’ll want to see it. If you don’t get this genre, there’s nothing really new about it to drag you in. Although, they’re a little coy with this movie: often we just see the plates on Godzilla’s back or its tail, rather than a full view of the monster.

Okay, so what follows are spoilers, kind of. Instead of summarizing the plot, I’ll make a few wry comments. As is typical with Godzilla movies, the initial human interest scenes before any monster appears are rather boring. Yes, they do need to set up the why behind what’s happening, but the humans just are not interesting when you came to see a monster smash skyscrapers.

I’ll reveal that Godzilla fights two monsters, both of which reminded me of the monster from Cloverfield. So the makers of this movie can think of it as Godzilla vs. Cloverfield.

The marketing has been odd. The military speech in the trailer above does not occur in the movie. And the scene at the end that reveals Godzilla wasn’t in the movie either.

Also, the second trailer above makes it look like the Statue of Liberty was damaged, which made me wonder how Godzilla got into the Atlantic, but that turned out not to be right. And I don’t remember the phone conversation between the husband and wife that way. It was more like he simply told her to stay put (which didn’t turn out to be the greatest idea).

Elizabeth Olson (the older sister of the Olson twins) is rather striking. They do such intense close ups, her eyes rival the size of the monster.

So have fun with Godzilla Joins the Navy or Godzilla vs. Cloverfield or Godzilla vs. Elizabeth Olson’s Eyes. 

Robin Hood

Last week I attended a middle school play. Among other performances were eighth graders who recited their own compositions on historical figures like Augustine and Eleanor of Aquitaine. There were also recitations of Bible verses and Shakespearean quotations. The main part of it was a play (really a series of mini-plays) on the adventures of Robin Hood.

I was having more difficulty with my new camera than I should have, so the only presentable picture is this one, showing the hand-sewn costumes for some of the female players.

Obviously, this doesn’t do the costumes justice, and it’s the typical awkward sort of picture that shows more of the background than the people. But this was a good evening with all the students having to play their parts, acting out surprisingly long lines of dialog by memory.

In a previous entry, I showed the head of Covenant Christian Middle School, Sara Loudon, in period dress.  

Supplement

Someone took a much better picture. It’s so good, I suspect this was done during rehearsal.

Click to enlarge

At the play, it took me a few moments to realize the girl was Robin Hood and the guy was Little John. Shrug. 

Battlestar Galactica at the Seattle Cinerama

The Cinerama—a gigantic theater in downtown Seattle—will be hosting a Battlestar Galactica event this Saturday. After a screening of a fan-chosen episode, Katee Sackhoff (Starbuck) and Tricia Helfer (Number 6) will be on hand for a Q&A session and autographs.

public domain 

I won’t be able to attend, but fans in the area should look into attending the “So Say We All Frak’n Day” at Seattle Cinerama.

Here’s a fun connection: a previous post of mine showed both Number 6’s dress and Starbuck’s flight jumpsuit, when they were displayed at a local museum. 

Lunar Eclipse, Good Book on Writing

Happy Good Friday

On Monday, I tried to see the total lunar eclipse. Alas, since I live in the Seattle area, the moon looked fuzzy early on, then the clouds began to noticeably obscure it during the 9:00 hour. By 10:40, it was covered. It was not worth staying up any later to glimpse the eclipse.

But M. Pax shot some good pictures, posted on her blog.

M. Pax also writes science fiction and fantasy. She gave some valuable advice when she recommended Building Great Sentences: Exploring the Writer's Craft by Brooks Landon. After you get past elementary books on grammar and style, this is what will make your writing worth reading.  

Star Trek bloopers

These are from the first year of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Denise Crosby, who played Lieutenant Yar, is my favorite in these.

At one point, it sounds like she’s swearing when her phaser doesn’t work. She actually says, “What’s happening to this puppy?” 

Koden

A family member passed away recently. Since we’re Japanese, members of the extended family gave us koden—gifts of money to help with the cost of the funeral.

An excellent article on how this is practiced in Japan is in this blog post I happened to find.

The ritual practices described in that post are not really done here in America. Surprisingly, stamps are involved.

Not really the stamp that was used, but I like it

Here in America, relatives use normal sympathy cards, and we prepare very ordinary-looking thank you cards in return. As was noted in the post linked to above, a small gift is given in return for the koden. This accidentally led to an argument over the phone.

ME: We’ll need X amount of stamps for the thank you cards.

OTHER PERSON: Okay, I’ll get X books of stamps.

ME: No, just X amount of stamps.

OTHER PERSON: So I’ll get X books of stamps from the post office.

ME: Why would you get entire books of stamps? You just need X stamps to mail out the cards!

This went on for a while. Then, because of my limited knowledge of koden, I was able to make a guess. 

ME: You mean you give out a book of stamps to each person who gave koden?

OTHER PERSON: Yes. Some people give half a book of stamps. I give a whole book.  

So apparently giving out a book of stamps (or half a book) is a normal gift in return for koden money among Japanese-Americans. I’m not sure to what extent the koden tradition will continue in my generation, but the gifts back will be equally American in nature. 

Washing the Thumb Drive

I was going to move my wash basket when I noticed one of my thumb drives was sitting next to it. That obviously meant it had fallen out of a pants pocket. Oh no, I just washed a thumb drive.

Nice and clean after washing

With great trepidation, I tested it. The Word, Excel, and Picture files seem to be fine. (Fortunately, this was a backup drive I don’t use much.) This is not so much a tribute to modern electronics, since that would get messed up by being immersed. It’s a tribute to the more mundane sort of factories that can machine the molds for the cover to such a tiny fraction of an inch, the plastic cap makes a waterproof seal when snapped onto the rest of the drive.

While Battlestar Galactica was on the air, I thought they should have come out with a thumb drive that looked like the Galactica and call it—you guessed it—a jump drive. I tended to accidentally call these things jump drives while watching the series.

And now for a  shameless plug: this reminds of the time I went to the Science Fiction Museum in Seattle for the Battlestar Galactica exhibit. It featured the life-size vipers (fighter jets) used in the series. You can see that post here.