On
Sunday evening, I visited my church’s youth group, which I’ve done on other
occasions. I purposefully arrived late because I knew they were having a nerf
gun battle at the start. You have to imagine over thirty middle schoolers and
high schoolers battling it out inside a church building. I watched the last
part of it from outside and decided it wasn’t the size of the gun, it was speed
and strategy that mattered.
photo by JKDesigns
After
that, they all sat down, and we were asked to name things we were thankful for.
I decided to start with something funny, so I said, “I saw Ender’s Game, so I’m
glad I got here after your foosball game.”
Obviously,
I made a mistake by saying “foosball” instead of “nerf gun,” but I don’t think
it mattered. A couple of the kids chuckled. The rest of the 30+ kids stared at
me, not making a sound.
So
I don’t think I should quit my day job.
I
recovered from that and made a strategic statement. I said, “Not all the adults
in church will say this, but I’m thankful for the internet. It makes research a
lot easier. And as long as you watch yourself, it’s no different from walking
into a bookstore.” I was indicating there was no real moral difference, because I didn’t want them to think that all
the adults are a bunch of stick-in-the-mud types.
Not
long after that, I realized the senior pastor had walked into the back of the
room and must have heard what I said. He likes to rail against the internet
from the pulpit.
They
had leftover pizza from earlier in the evening that they were urging people to
take. I wasn’t going to eat anything, but I finally snagged a piece and ate it
on the way to my car. That night, I had bad food poisoning and was desperately
trying to rip the cellophane open to some pink bismuth (the generic form of
Pepto Bismol).
So
that was my sparkly evening.