Thursday, August 16, 2012

Red and Cinderella

Leigh Covington is hosting the “WHAT IF?”" Fairy Tale Madness Blogfest.  Put a twist on a well-known fairytale, post the result, link to her site, and see if you win a prize. 

Here’s my entry for the best comic relief category, Red and Cinderella: 

Red lay on the stony ground, her own sweat, blood, and vomit reeking in her nostrils.  She plucked out an arrow that had penetrated her leather, gashing her stomach.  “Funny, our going out this way.” 

To her left, a couple bloody streaks showed on Cinderella’s bare midriff.  The sassy gal could barely lift her head.  “Y’know, if we had met under different circumstances, I still don’t think we would’ve liked each other.” 

They couldn’t afford to chuckle with abdominal wounds. 

Before them, Hansel strutted.  “Odd final words, witches.” 

Red spit defiance.  “For crying out loud!” 

Beside him, Gretel undid her ceremonial scarf.  “You still insist you killed a wolf all by yourself?” 


“And first, it came on to you, and your grandmother?” 

“She does aerobics, you half-wit!” 

Hansel pulled his loose scarf taut with both hands, the punching sound it made meant to intimidate.  “And you, you claim you snuck into a ball in a pumpkin?  With mice?” 

Cinderella put grit in her voice.  “What’s it to ya?” 

Gretel looked at her brother.  “Dibs.” 

Red tried to struggle as the girl lowered herself, her head blocking the sun, but the knobby knees held Red’s elbows in place.  She felt the deadly silk looping around her neck, the cruel stones bruising her back as she flinched. 

Cinderella moved her shoulder, not quite able to raise her arm.  “Look behind you.” 

Hansel’s smirk came through in his voice.  “My, I’m disappointed at that one.  Urk!” 

The scarf loosened.  Red gulped air.  She saw Gretel looking back over her right shoulder.  Wrong one, ditz

Past the left shoulder, a woman with wings, eyes glowing a wrathful purple, stood.  Red remembered Cinderella claimed her godmother was from Faerie. 

Red spit upward, into Gretel’s face.  “Hey, first time turning into a pumpkin?”  


J. A. Bennett said...

Lol, great ending! Very witty :)

Morgan said...

You are verrrry talented, my friend. Truly! I totally enjoyed this... It's clear you've got talent and humor. Really, really, really nice job! ;)

Leigh Covington said...

Very inventive and fun to read!
Loved it! Thanks so much for being part of the fest!

Nick Wilford said...

Awesome mashup. This was a fun read, and the dialogue was great!

Mark Murata said...

Thank you. Your comments are very kind.

Stephen James Lock said...

I enjoyed your writing, read like a movie scene in my head :) Nice twist!

Donna Hole said...

I liked the mix of several tales. This was a cool adventure.


Mark Koopmans said...

Aloha Mark,

Loved your entry and laughed out loud with your "They couldn’t afford to chuckle with abdominal wounds" line.

That was classic:)

New follower here, 'cos of your writing and 'cos you have a cool first name :)


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